Shredding it

Q: I have been with my fiancee for 10 yrs now and we have 2 kids together. Most of the time we get along great, but when we fight it gets crazy. Or I should say, I get crazy. Recently, we got into a fight, he walked away without a word to take a shower and it fueled me. I was raging and I took his treasured autographed Cubs jersey, pulled out the scissors, and shredded it. It felt good, but then when he came out of the shower, I saw the look on his face and I felt terrible. I’m not a bad person, I just get so angry. He’s been staying at his parents the last couple days and told me that unless I get anger management classes or seek therapy, he’ll cut off the engagement. I hate those froo froo classes and am not looney enough to seek therapy, what should I do?

A: Woman, are you kidding me? ‘I just get angry’, that’s a little bit of an understatement. You took something of deep meaning from someone you’re supposed to spend forever with and just went to town on it. Wow. He has good reason to be upset, that cuts into the very core of his manhood and who he is, don’t mess with men and their sports. If you’re going to be with this guy, you’re going to have to respect his interests, just as he should respect any scrapbooking, quilting, etc hobbies/interests you have. But, you guys have a son together and he’s already made a commitment to you, he deserves to get the best of you and you deserve to be heard without your anger railroading the whole discussion. I’m voting for you to go, you’re risking your family, your son, if you don’t get help for yourself. Look at the alternative, if you don’t go, then you’ll end up as a single parent and your child will be between split homes and you will still be an angry person. Don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing wrong with being a single parent and having split homes, but is that what you want for the 3 of you? Honey, you’re doing more than just shredding a shirt, you’re shredding a family, a family that I don’t think you’re ready to let fall apart. Find out who that angry person is and let the rational, problem solving person you have in you, come out to the ballfield.

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